Hidden Grief | Wedding Photos

In late 2019 I was involved with two in-person grief groups (The Compassionate Friends and The Dinner Party) and many more online. I noticed that only in these safe spaces did the bereaved felt comfortable enough to disclose what they were truly thinking. Wishes for harm to come to others so they wouldn't feel less alone in their grief, anger at the surviving partner or spouse or child. Disdain for the friends that they used to adore.
Usually when you admit these feelings to the general public folks try to talk you down from your opinion, "Oh, you don't really want your friends to have a stillbirth, do you?!". But when you're in the company of bereaved you instead hear, "I understand."
It was at that point that I invited followers to share their own secrets. I call the series Hidden Grief and have received hundreds of submissions over the years. This is one of many. 
Black image with white text that reads, "My brother was 23 when he died and it was just 5 weeks before my wedding." Features a lavender Save the date message for Lexi and Mike with a wedding date of August 21, 2004
Black background with four stick figures holding hands, a bride and groom with their siblings on the ends. Text reads, "Like me, my hsuband also had one sibling, a sister. I had planned for the four of us to take a cute, funny picgture with the wedding photographer."
Black background with the bride thinking of her sister-in-law with a frown face. Text reads, "Instead I called the photographer to let him know about my brother. And I told him I didn't want any pictures of just my husband and his sister together. I even felt disdain for her because she was alive and my brother was gone.
Black background with the bride as a stick figure, in the future. She is holding two photographers. One is of her with her husband on their wedding day. The other is of her deceased brother. Text reads, "To this day I ahve no regrets about that photo. It's been 19 years."
My only requirement for Hidden Grief posts is that the comment section must be 100% supportive. Any user who tries to coach another out of their feelings is removed. While I certainly may not share the experience with the anonymous submitter, I do know how important it is to share feeling without judgement. For more Hidden Grief.
We have many Hidden Grief posts. Including this one on another departed brother, social media posts on dead celebrities, and when the "wrong" parent dies first.  
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