Blog

My daily thoughts

My daily thoughts

by Kellyn Shoecraft
I posted this series on instagram the other day, but wanted to share it here too. Grief is exhausting, and part of it is due to the enormous amount...
Grief experience Sibling loss
Stop asking, “how are you?”

Stop asking, “how are you?”

by Kellyn Shoecraft
I hate it when someone asks me, “how are you?” Actually, I don’t really mind the question when someone I don’t know asks. I recognize it for what i...
Grief support What to say
Thank you cards and why I don’t do them (anymore)

Thank you cards and why I don’t do them (anymore)

by Kellyn Shoecraft
I come from a long line of fastidious thank you card writers. My grandmother once questioned me about why my husband didn’t write her a thank you c...
Grief support Thank you cards
Should I go to the funeral?

Should I go to the funeral?

by Kellyn Shoecraft
Being the co-host of two funerals tops the list of my life’s stranger experiences. I dreaded both my sister’s and father’s services, wishing I coul...
Funeral Grief support
Making a List - How the Bereaved Keep Score

Making a List - How the Bereaved Keep Score

by Kellyn Shoecraft
There is a grief underbelly: a dark, cold place swirling with thoughts that many grievers have but are too ashamed to admit. They’re usually only v...
Grief experience
Sympathy by Proxy

Sympathy by Proxy

by Kellyn Shoecraft
When it comes to couples and immediate families, there’s usually one person who gets designated the role “Public Representative for All Corresponde...
Strategies Support
How to Facebook when someone is hurting

How to Facebook when someone is hurting

by Kellyn Shoecraft
In 2011 I had my first experience with death. Well - death on Facebook. A former classmate of mine had died in the early morning hours in a motorcy...
Support What to say
Our dog died....and why you shouldn't judge grief (but it's hard not to)

Our dog died....and why you shouldn't judge grief (but it's hard not to)

by Kellyn Shoecraft
On Wednesday, January 31, we had to euthanize our dog Abe.  The date lies exactly six days after the anniversary of my husband's mother's death (1/...
Grief support Pet Loss Strategies
How we survived the holidays

How we survived the holidays

by Kellyn Shoecraft
Members of my grief group began talking about the holidays in October. Though I was new to the group, I had actually already made plans for my fami...
Grief experience
Where are all the grievers?

Where are all the grievers?

by Kellyn Shoecraft
If we love, we will grieve. What a sad proclamation for love. An obvious truth that many of us deliberately ignore to prevent sudden onset pani...
Grief Life's toughest moments Podcasts
Why is it so hard to know what to say (also - what should I say?)

Why is it so hard to know what to say (also - what should I say?)

by Kellyn Shoecraft
My dad was very sick in the summer of 2003 - he was waiting for a kidney and pancreas transplant and was not healthy enough for the surgery. He had...
Grief support Life's toughest moments What to say
When Sh*t Hits the Fan - Give the Gift of Toilet Paper

When Sh*t Hits the Fan - Give the Gift of Toilet Paper

by Kellyn Shoecraft
It's really hard to understand what living with grief is like until you have to live with grief. It's equally hard to know what it's like to get a ...
Grief support